Reinforcing rules

My mum bless her was admitted to hospital with another TIA.no-drinking-sign

I was relieved as she has now had brain and neck scans and they are taking things seriously. She has been allowed back home which is where she wants to be, and my dad seems happy to care for her.

Further tests are planned and I hope things will start happening and they will get the support they need.

I spent the day in hospital with her yesterday, so had no time to really speak to Faith.

He has asked to stay at my house but I am not convinced he’s not drinking. He swears he’s not but I don’t have the energy to force the issue.

When I get back from hospital he tells me he has not had a drink but wants to go and get a can.

He seems to have been confused by the different information he’s had over the last few days as I am too. If he wants to go into rehab he must be drinking!

This time I know I need to reinforce my rules. I explain this to him, I cannot allow him to drink in my home, this also means he can’t go out and drink then expect to come back.

He takes what I say without argument and decides to go home.

I am pleased I held out, but not happy he still wanted to drink. I have too many phone calls to make to spend much time thinking about it.

I leave my mobile phone on at night in case my parents need me. I am not impressed when I am woken at 4 by a message from Faith saying he keeps being sick. Nothing more than I expected. I ignore it.

This morning I message him back explaining again that it is his body rejecting the alcohol not withdrawal, I think he finally might be starting to understand this. I have another day of family commitments, he calls in the morning and again in the afternoon to let me know he is OK so I wont worry, he doesn’t understand that I am really not that worried at the moment, he is actually healthier than he has been for a while, but I guess it is his way of showing his concern for me at this stressful time.

I have heard nothing tonight so I guess he’s drinking. I wont contact him.

At the moment stepping back is what I need and I have learnt over the years when I need to do it.

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